My 30 day commitment to GF

So I've decided it's time to eliminate gluten. Everything I've read has reinforced that this shit is poison to me,  you,  and anyone SUFFERING from Hashimoto's  Thyroiditis, Graves Disease, inflammation,  migraines....  I could go on and on.

And by suffering, I mean, questioning your sanity, your health, your emotions, and the damage you've done to your body for years. Not only do I struggle with body image, I now, without a doubt,  am battling an autoimmune disease that is attacking my body.

Basically,  I feel like CRAP. 

So today is day ONE (yes, again) that I've decided to make a change.

Again? Yes, again. Again because food is powerful. It has the ability to heal us, and kill us. It has the ability to control us, our  emotions, our celebrations, our justifications for being happy... or sad, or mad... or fat.... or  fit.

Too many times I've let food destroy me. I gave it all the power.  Thanks Lil Debbie, you lil bitch... is what I've always claimed. Thanks to you, I said,  I'm  struggling in this life. Being  Southern, is what I said, is the reason I enjoy food and eat at every turn.

But not today. Today, I am strong and I am determined to take control over my addictions.

First step: Gluten. @$$#/! $@×# GLUTEN! 

Today my diet has included coffee, cucumbers, snap peas, pecans, rotisserie  chicken and corn tortillas.

Have I removed gluten today ? I'm not sure?!?

Where are you Google? 

Okay,  so I've found that some coffees do contain fillers and additives that are a no-no.  Luckily MY coffee is a GO!!
THANKS Dunkin Donuts! I found my super answer here.

Being on a low-carb diet as well, I was kinda worried about the yellow corn tortillas. May not be good for low-carbing, but OK for GF. That'll be a sometimes food. But luckily, my MISSION tortillas said GF right on the package... duh!!

SO....I've done okay in the gluten free world. 

And I feel okay in my mind and body tonight. I could give the gore later if you're interested in what gluten and carbs can do even if you AREN'T celiac. 

Xoxo

Nee

The #FoodShame

If you are the type of person to #FoodShame someone for what they put into their mouth, DO NOT READ THIS ANY FURTHER. :)

I recently paid my way into a weight loss challenge at work.  Ninety days, do what cha gotta do to lose weight.  Not inches, not gain muscle, not smaller pants, not body fat percentage. WEIGHT.

I lost 17.2 pounds in 90 days and won $200.00 (TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS) !!!!!

I have been in this business of losing WEIGHT since 1978.  I'd like to say I have EXPERIENCE in losing weight, but I dont.  I have experience in the BUSINESS of losing weight. Lmfao. (not really, hahaha, my fucking ass is still here, following me everywhere I go)

I'd like to tell you how I lost the weight this time, but I can't really pinpoint exactly which change allowed me to freely spend my hard-earned $200.00.

The first change was a positive diagnosis to an autoimmune disease that I always knew I was suffering from, it just took a caring physician to trust ME enough to run the appropriate tests.

Diagnosis #1) without great explanation, a gastrointestinal infection that is hard to treat with antibiotics because of its stubborn resistance.  The inflammation caused disgusting symptoms and a duodenal ulcer in my small intestine. Can lead to stomach cancer.

Diagnosis #2 )  Remember "Mono" in middle school?  The "Kissing Disease"?  Yeah. Thats the one. Can lead to Hodgkins Lymphoma, Rheumatoid Arthritis, and Multiple Sclerosis. Awesome.

Diagnosis #3) Hashis Thyroiditis - come to find out, Diagnoses #1 & #2 lead to the autoimmune disease Hashimoto's, which is now destroying my thyroid, sending me into another illness and fogging up my eyesight and MY mind! ;) Can lead to thyroid cancer. Awesomer!!!

So back to the food. And the weight. Yay.

Most everything I have found on the world wide web has led me back to a gluten-free Paleo diet. Poop. Well, sorta. 

So change number two, I cut carbs, gluten, sugar, and any other foods in a box or a bag found in the center aisles of the grocery store.   First week, I lost 9 pounds.

WHAT. THIS SHIT WORKS???

I also incorporated  butter. Yes. I said butter. Real, grass -fed butter. Preferably from Ireland. :) WELL, Winn-Dixie. 

If you need an explanation,  watch the  video.

Cutting carbs and gluten meant bacon, chicken, sausage, cheese and ranch dressing. Among others,  but those are things I never  ate when eating "clean" . 

I cheated more than I should but I did notice that GLUTEN made me feel HORRIBLE.  Sugar gave me the worst stomach cramps and butter gave me energy and kept me fuller longer WHEN MIXED IN MY COFFEE.  Don't hate. 

So getting several diagnoses, attempting to regulate  my thyroid function, cutting carbs and gluten, and adding butter, gave me, on average, a 1.43 lb LOSS PER WEEK. 

I did get a negative  response  from my gyno nurse, but she's a skinny bitch and I don't care about anything she says about my ability to maintain a certain "lifestyle". Boo. Hater. :) 

With all this  being said, several small changes  in my life proved to me that I was on to something.  

On your mark, get set,  yeah right.... I mean, I'm starting again really soon. 

 

A Pondering

So even though it's been 28 days since I have weighed this much, the 10 pound influx hurts my feelings and hurts my spirit.

I know that it's only temporary and I continue to watch my diet and drink my water.

I don't feel well enough this week to workout, but it is good time to reflect on my history, my progresses, my before and "after" photos. I realize that I miss 21 Day Fix, and Focus T25 and TurboFire, which was once my beloved soul mate.   I lent 21 Day Fix from my personal library and realize the lady who borrowed it hasn't used it, so I ponder over asking for it back.

For a couple more days, my head will hurt, my pants will be too tight, my back will throb and I'll be cranky-as-hell, but such is life when you are a woman of age.

I may take my children for a walk in the new Fall air tonight, and ponder some more.

Until then, keep pressing PLAY and never GIVE UP !

Xoxo,
Denise

Size 14

I have "battled my weight" for years. 

Tack on 6 pregnancies and closet eating and you can pretty much say weight is a problem for me. 

Or is it? I have always considered myself a big girl and have always been told I have a pretty face. It may have just been my mom and grandma, just sayin!!  I have loved AND loathed dressing myself to fit the body and shape I have, because it obviously was not going anywhere!  I settled for the fact that I was the biggest of my friends.....but don't get it twisted.....I have NEVER missed out on prom, boyfriends, love, attention, friends, jobs, the lake, parties, hookups at the bonfire,  children, compliments OR criticism.  This is not a sad story of a lonely fat girl. This is a story of a self-diagnosed fat girl, and to me, that makes all the difference in the world. The fact that I accepted myself for WHAT I WAS and perfected what I had. Not model material for sure, not a fashionista, but very rarely lacked confidence for what I wore. I know there are things that people don't want to see when someone is plus sized and I respect that! I CHOSE to refrain from certain items of clothing in public, because I personally didn't feel like it was ATTRACTIVE.  I settled in at size 18 after my two children were born. My husband loves me, I loved me, I thought.

One day in 2012, my belly was bigger than my 38DD bra, and it hurt. A womanly figure, chest/waist/hips in proportion, no matter the number has proven to be incredibly sexy....and I relied on that proportion. My diet or lack there of, threw off my numbers...and for the first time in my life,I FELT and looked FAT.

I typically don't mope and complain and I don't prescribe other women to do it either. I get UP and DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.   Fast forward to March 2014,  I am an Independent Beachbody Coach, a sexy, strong, confident, plus sized woman, in proportion, in a size 14.

Let me share something else with you. Big girls stick together.  A big fine woman who likes to back dat @ss up will convince you ANY day, that a man prefers MEAT over a BONE!  We promote a positive self image no matter your size and encourage you to Eff Your Beauty Standards (@TessMunster) ......until you betray the big girl creed? 

I have bought plus sized clothes since I was in the 6th grade. I've earned that badge. 

Just recently I asked my local plus-sized-clothes-for-sale-Facebook-group if size 14 was still plus sized. I posted bc I couldn't find any used clothing listings for size 14.  I was quickly told that I needed to find a typical sized page to advertise my used sized 14s and that if I  posted there, it would be deleted and I would be banned. Do you understand why? 

I didn't, until.....I was told that size 14 was no longer plus size. What? Yes it is! No, size 14 is in the cusp of typical and plus-size, only size 14Womens (14W) is sold at the plus-sized specialty stores. Therefore, YOU OUT! 

Harsh. Considering I'm STILL A BIG GIRL! 

Not accepted as typical sized and not accepted in the plus size world. 

The sexy body image that I waved flag for, is only accepted if you fall into a category! So if a big girl decides to lose weight, do you now call her a conformist to the typical world? If I gain weight and get back in with the plus-sized, arent I still conforming? 

I have to say that I am guilty of wondering why a big girl would lose weight and betray other big girls in the world. I think women of all sizes are beautiful, but I have a special place in my heart for those who don't care what society thinks is beautiful and those that wave that flag proudly! 

Take aforementioned Tess Munster, isn't she beautiful?

Do you still think she's beautiful?

Shes proud of her body, she is comfortable, and she is confident, and in all senses of the word, shes SEXY. 

Now, my dear Elly Mayday,  I always hoped that one day I could look like her, realistically, you know, because that body I've been carrying around didn't seem to be going anywhere.  But maybe I could at least sport it the way she does, so confidently! 

I saw her in a photo once, looking like she had lost a few pounds, and my first thought was  "WHY?"  

"Why would she do that?  She has a great career as a plus-sized model, and shes my body role model, and I'm not having any luck losing weight, WHY would she do that???"

Until I saw this. 

My gorgeous Elly had been secretly battling ovarian cancer and taking chemo treatments, until she couldn't hide it anymore.  I felt horrible for judging her about conforming to the typical-sized world. HORRIBLE.  I wanted to cry when she posted this picture on Facebook. She took that opportunity, though, to show us how beautiful we could be at any size or health.

Elly is in remission and in better health, still getting to know her new body and new outlook on what could have been a very short life. I challenge us all to stop judging and stop conforming and stop judging about conforming to one standard or another. Beauty. Its in the eye of the beholder. 

I'm in a size 14.  I haven't turned coat on my big girls and not trying to blend in with the skinny girls.   I just want to be the BEST VERSION OF ME.  If I feel its a happy size 10, then so it is. Size 10 would be a huge accomplishment for someone who has NEVER worn a typical size 0 thru 12.  However, in modern day, size 10 would STILL BE PLUS SIZE!  I understand the categories and department segregation just for the sheer ease of shopping, but to be belittled and talked to in a certain way because I no longer fit in category one OR two,  it just broke my heart. 

All my love, 

 

To New Friends

Update:

My lesson for this past weekend was that women who empower each other, support each other and laugh with each other, are true friends.

And… women who 5K together,  are friends forever!

I had an unforgettable Saturday with a group of girls who I will always consider my friends.

Team Bombshell’s day started on a 7:30am trek to Baton Rouge, Louisiana, to make a 9:30am registration time and 10:30am start time.

5k Foam Fest in Baton Rouge, claim to “get filthy clean” in the mud and the foam obstacle course. As far as 5k promotions go, it was over the top played up.  

When we arrived at the site, we realized there wasn’t much “foam” or “fest”. I remember calling it “lame” from the start, though I was super excited to do it!

We had a 10:30am registration time, and right at 10:30am, off we went through the cloud of foam at the starting line. I don’t think we saw any more foam for the next hour.  Our 5k turned out to be a hike in the Louisiana rainforest up and down muddy hills and trails, over the river, and through the woods. Luckily, the fest promoters had rebarb*  stakes and caution tape marking off the trail for us, and at times, we found ourselves using that tape to keep ourselves upright…it was that or the barbed wire that lined the {what appeared to be} cattle farm.

The incredible rainstorms and flash flooding we had had the days before, caused for a lot of mud and a lot of WATER… our 3 hour hike was alongside a river and its now-swollen banks, I think what was intended to be mud, was now an all-out-river-running-through-it, current and all, 8 feet deep at one point.

Our group of 6 strong bombshells teamed up to climb muddy banks, slip down muddy embankments into over flowing river water, around turns and corners, not knowing what to find. Our 5k was definitely not a run. It was challenging just to stay on your feet!  We slipped in water, in mud, in gross smelling darker mud, we ran through weeds and grass, through decaying leaves and sand dunes. We climbed over innertubes afloat a swollen river,  we were serenaded by Cousin Vinny, who challenged us to have a SAFE Saturday and to be CHAMPIONS of the rope house obstacle. As a team, we skipped a lame rope obstacle, that had you climbing sideways a foot off the ground.  We walked through shotgun shells, and near dead carcasses.  We tip-toed and scooted our feet along soggy river bottoms and fell into deep holes, soaking us to the bone. We worshipped the sunshine as it shone through the trees and waited in line to walk on water at the Lilypad Obstacle.   We were made fun of for being #TeamBombshell, we were photographed and photobombed as #TeamBombshell, we were reminded of what a #HotMess we were, and how #SuperFit we are NOT. 

Leaving the rainforest and the first 2 miles of our trek,  the open fields escorted us to 4 more foam obstacles, a 30 food Death Drop, a Body Wash reminisce of a car wash, a foam cube of fighting lemons and our finale, ¼ of a mile away, we ran our asses off to a slip and slide, to the Finish Line.  At the finish line, we received a medal, by a man sitting in a folding chair, a 100 calorie granola bar, a bottle of water, a too-small tee shirt, and one can of black cherry Mike’s Hard Lemonade.  There was no music, no celebration…but to sit our butts down in that warm grass, surrounded by forever friends, was freaking PRICELESS.

WE LOVED IT!

We basked ourselves in the sunlight, enjoyed our one free “cold one”, and carried on to rinse off the remaining mud and gunk, to the car to dry off and remove shoes, and then off to change at my sister’s nearby house in Denham Springs, Louisiana. 

My Saturday ended more than 12 hours after it started with the following Facebook post from my driveway.

Denise Wayne

March 29

Finally home. 5k foam mud river rat dirty panty kinda day. I cant drive another minute. If you need me, ill be floating in my tub. Xoxo
Amber Sterner Krystle King Womack Jaycee Lasso Eliza Galle Amanda Snowden
#teambombshell
#sangtomecousinvinny
#justcuzyousuperfitdontmeanitainthard

I wanted to write this to document the day, as not a Bombshell brought a phone or a camera (water, foam, mud)  and the promised photographers who would capture our day, WERE NOT IN THE WOODS OR RIVER, didn’t seem to show up, or didn’t post a single one of us in action.  I am keeping my fingers crossed that because it's only Monday, the photos have not all been uploaded yet.

WE LOVED IT!  I think its safe to say that we do it over and over and over again ANYDAY!  The friendships we made on Saturday, I just can’t say enough.

#TeamBombshell

#BombshellDynasty

#HotMess

#CousinVinny

#5kFoamFest

#yeahright

#ToGrandmothersHouseWeGo

#LikeaMonkeyF**kingAFootball

#MyHooIsFrozen

#WhyIsEveryoneWalking


Updates:  The photographers came through and thanks to Amber Sterner for finding them!!!

*I know its
rebar.

Did you know?

Johns Hopkins says that CANCER CELLS FEED ON:

Sugar is a cancer-feeder.. By cutting off sugar, a person cuts off one important food supply to the cancer cells. Sugar substitutes like Stevia, xytol, honey, etc., are natural products. Even better natural substitutes would be Manuka honey or molasses but only in very small amounts.

 

Table salt has a chemical added to make it white in color. Better alternative is Bragg's aminos or sea salt.

Milk causes the body to produce mucus, especially in the gastro-intestinal tract. Cancer feeds on mucus. By cutting off milk and substituting with unsweetened almond milk, cancer cells are being starved. 

Cancer cells thrive in an acid environment.. A meat-based diet is acidic and it is best to eat fish, and a little chicken rather than beef or pork. Meat also contains livestock antibiotics, growth hormones and parasites, which are all harmful, especially to people with cancer.

  

A diet made of 80% fresh vegetables and juice, whole grains, seeds, nuts and a little fruit helps put the body into an alkaline environment. About 20% can come from cooked food including beans.. Fresh vegetable juices provide live enzymes that are easily absorbed and reach down to cellular levels within 15 minutes to nourish and enhance growth of healthy cells. To obtain live enzymes for building healthy cells, try drinking fresh vegetable juice (most vegetables including bean sprouts) and eating some raw vegetables 2 or 3 times a day. Enzymes are destroyed at temperatures of 104 degrees F (40 degrees C). 

Avoid coffee, tea, and chocolate, which have high caffeine. Green tea is a better alternative and has cancer fighting properties. Water: best to drink purified water, or filtered, to avoid known toxins and heavy metals in tap water. Distilled water is acidic, avoid it.

Meat protein is difficult to digest and requires a lot of digestive enzymes. Undigested meat remaining in the intestines becomes putrefied and leads to more toxic buildup!!!! Gross! 

Cancer cell walls have a tough protein covering. Refraining from or eating less meat frees more enzymes to attack the protein walls of cancer cells and allows the body's killer cells to destroy the cancer cells.

Some supplements build up the immune system (IP6, Flor-ssence, Essiac, anti-oxid ants, vitamins, minerals, EFAs etc.) to enable the bodies own killer cells to destroy cancer cells. Other supplements like Vitamin E are known to cause apoptosis, or programmed cell death, the body's normal method of disposing of damaged, unwanted, or unneeded cells.

Cancer is a disease of the mind, body, and spirit. A proactive and positive spirit will help the cancer warrior be a survivor. Anger, un-forgiveness and bitterness put the body into a stressful and acidic environment. Learn to have a loving and forgiving spirit. Learn to relax and enjoy life.

 Cancer cells cannot thrive in an oxygenated environment. Exercising daily and deep breathing help to get more oxygen down to the cellular level. Oxygen therapy is another means employed to destroy cancer cells.

1. No plastic containers in microwave.

2. No water bottles in freezer.

3. No plastic wrap in microwave.

Amending Our Diets

For me, I have always researched healthy “diets” in search of something that worked for me, not just in losing weight, but something that I could adopt and STICK TO.   I have tried frozen dinners filled with too much sodium and too many processed ingredients. 

I have tried the Cabbage Soup Diet, the Vegetable Soup diet which allowed bananas and milk only on Tuesdays.

I have tried phentermine,  which was supposed to help me in losing weight, no matter my diet.

I have tried No Carb, Low Carb, Slow Carb and Atkins.

I have tried Weight Watchers.

I have tried a Vegan diet, a Vegetarian diet, and a Pescatarian diet.

The common denominator in all of these diets, is that “I tried”- I tried them all, and gave up on them for one reason or another.

The best results I have seen, that kept me motivated and willing to keep going, has been eating CLEAN.  I slip and fall, but I know that this “diet” is something that I can go back to over and over until the adoption process in my mind is complete.   Eating clean leaves you full and satisfied and energized to get healthy, exercise, get outside and breathe in some fresh air!

Eating clean, basically means to eat only foods that help to fuel your body, and to heal your body.  There is nothing beneficial in eating a food processed in a factory, I don’t care what they’veenriched it with; added fiber, calcium, iron, vitamin D, whatever.

In addition to eating clean, I’m going to focus on portion control. This is what I have seen until recently on portion sizes:

This is what the 21 Day Fix has showed me; these color-coded containers, several containers, several times a day.

“Its really that simple!” they say !

For a self-diagnosed food addict, its IMPERATIVE that I SHOP, PLAN, AND PORTION ACCORDING TO THIS SCHEDULE AND NOT EAT ANYTHING OUTSIDE OF MY SCHEDULE. My slippery-slope of cheat foods starts with ONE SLIP.  You would not offer an alcoholic, just ONE SHOT, and say “hey, in moderation its fine!” Sometimes you need to just cut things that are triggers for YOU, even if its just temporary.. you know, to get it OUT of your system, and to get your mind right.

If you can drink just 4oz wine, then DRINK IT.. If you can eat just a TABLESPOON on chocolate chips, THEN EAT THEM!  But I cannot, and have to find moderation in other places, like cheese, or dressing, or carbs.

Also, I know this fact, and must be reminded on a regular basis, that my water intake must be ON POINT, and that means, for me, 100 ounces per day.  Sounds like a lot, but spread from 5am to 11pm and a sip or two throughout the night, I can EASILY go over 100 ozs. 

Heres my water tip enjoyed by a lot of you on Facebook.

Heres my portion control tip:  Also, if you need help color-coding, please email me, I’d love to explain the colors to you! Once you know what colors you can have and when, it becomes “really that simple!” J    

Lets do this together !  Email me for unconditional support ! All I wanted in becoming a Beachbody Coach, was to motivate and EMPOWER other women like me!   Too often, I get “unfriended” or made fun of for what I’m doing in my life these days.. i.e. Fat Girl Preaches Getting Fit, But Stumbles, And She Doesn’t Look Like Shes Losing Weight Anyways, Don’t Make Eye Contact, She’ll Ask Me If I’ve Been Working Out, Do You Think Shes Trying To Sell Me Something?

That’s okay, my goal was to Empower YOU to achieve YOUR goals, and to find MYSELF along the way.